All divorces require court approval to be final and legally binding. These final agreements are put in writing and signed by the judge. This is called an “uncontested divorce” despite the fact that there may have been many conflicts and disputes during the process. Only 5-15% of divorcing spouses reach the trial stage of divorce. Since trials are costly financially and emotionally, most people, including judges and lawyers, make every effort to settle their disputes without reaching this stage. Trials are last resort options when the well-being of yourself or your children hangs in the balance.
However, be cautioned. Do not delude yourself. Many people want a judge to decide because they hope to gain an advantage in the case. For them, trials are about “winning”, not justice.
Court Intervention
The amount of court intervention your case needs depends upon the number of issues which you need to be resolved. If you can settle some of the support, custody, or property issues, you can present those as an agreement and limit your trial to evidence only on the issues you weren’t able to resolve.
Once the court has been called upon to resolve a divorce, the court’s role changes from one of simple review of an agreement to a forum for adversarial conflict resolution. Most states have recognized that the adversarial system doesn’t serve families and children well, sustaining conflict by enabling people to testify against one another in hopes of gaining money, property, or child custody rights. Courtrooms are the last resort for those cases which are not resolved by the parties themselves.
Once divorcing spouses have entered the court arena, the chance for a meeting of the minds is greatly diminished. After having heard everything bad your spouse has to say about you, you may have a hard time working through the inevitable loose ends: dividing up the photograph albums, or deciding who gets which TV set, not to mention exchanging parenting schedules or sitting down together at a parent/teacher conference at your child’s school. Going to court can be a useful resource, and it may be your only reasonable choice after you’ve exhausted negotiations with your spouse in every available forum, but it’s best used as a last resort.
If you are headed to trial, and you have been representing yourself, you will want to consider hiring a lawyer to represent you in court. If your spouse has an attorney, it is in your best interests to hire your own representative. At the very least, you should seek out the assistance of a lawyer in planning your case and assembling your evidence so that you present a concise, well-organized case to the judge.
Be sure to visit our resource center at http://www.peace-talks.com/resources.php. For the pros and cons of going to court see, http://www.peace-talks.com/proscons.php.
Excerpted from Your Divorce Advisor: A Lawyer and a Psychologist Guide You Through the Legal and Emotional Landscape of Divorce (Simon & Schuster/Fireside 2001). For more information: http://www.yourdivorceadvisor.com/.
For more information contact Peace Talks www.peace-talks.com
(C) 2008 Peace Talks Mediation Services, Inc.
No related posts.
